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gagonaryeferrey
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Name: Ryan
Location: United States
Birthday: 9/3/1986
Gender: Male
Interests: beautiful music, long walks on the beach
Expertise: computer geek
Occupation: Other
Industry: Other
Message: message me
AIM:  computerjunkie0
Member Since:
5/28/2005
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| This summer has been great so far. Last weekend was so long it felt
like a week, one of the best weeks of my life. Waking up at 12, going
out till 3, amazing. I saw Batman Begins, one of my new favorite
movies, on the imax. It was quite an experience. I took friends out
driving, going crazy speeds up and down Chicago's fine and not-so-fine
expressways. I went to the beach with Richie late late at night. We
almost got fined 75 bucks for going swimming in the lake at 1 am. Who
knew? Ironically the fireworks on the fourth weren't that great, NOT
the highlight of the weekend by a longshot. But spending time with my
friends at Adam Ciganek's on the fourth and getting my ass handed to me
in halo was still good.
Now the week is almost over, tomorrow's friday. I wish i could slow
down a little and take a nice look around. My dad did come home from
france, and that was pretty cool. He and dave were gone for a week and
a half. They showed us some pictures, some of which were of dave
frolicking (i kid you not!) through a field in classic frolicking
poses. HILARIOUS. As much as i hate the kid sometimes, dave is just
quirky and it's so funny. God i want dairy queen tonight.
I have to quit my stupid library job. I have a new job that makes way
more money and is way more fun. Why am i still working at the library?
Probably cuz my boss hasn't been around and i can't tell my boss i'm
quitting if she's never there to begin with. If she's not there
tonight, then i'm telling somebody anybody that i will be leaving soon.
QUITE soon.
On the good news front, i am sitting right in front of my brand spankin
new pool! It's 18' around and 4 and a half ft. deep--totally bitchin. I
know where i'll be spending the majority of my summer (in the pool duh
you idiot.)
I guess this will be a long entry because i forgot to write about my
depaul orientation. It was pretty sweet. The girls in college are so
hot. That is the most important thing to remember about college. Wow.
Anyway, we did a bunch of ice breaker games (hi my name is stupid and i
like things) which i fucking hate with a passion. But i talked to a
bunch of people who were really nice, maybe just because they didn't
want to be lonely on orientation, but nevertheless, nice to talk to.
Oddly enough, Dalia, an old friend, is going to depaul and i saw her on
orientation. Good times with Dalia. I'm not really so scared of college
anymore, not like i was before. It'll be a really great four year
party, if things go well.
Well children, i think you have enough to read. I shall take my leave for a day or two or three or whatever.
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| What would you do if i sang out of tune? Would you stand up and walk out on me?
How come life can't be all nice and simple? So much drama of my own creation, yuck. No thanks. I'll take a pass.
I'm scared right now. Of what you ask? Alas, nothing in particular.
College? Yes. Having to say goodbye to my friends? Double yes. Being an
idiot around my girlfriend? :chuckle: Yes. It sounds kinda silly once i
say them, but they're there. Most of all it is scary for me to be
insecure. I know, I know, only a little more dumping, just bear with me
here  . I should just grab life by the horns (or whatever protrusion
you prefer to use in that context) and show fear who's boss in my
house.
So i went to a gathering, a party if you will down at the beach, which
was fun. And i got to sit on the beach with Na. The final word is: we
did not do it on the beach. Or did we........No, we just sat on the
beach trying our best not to look to the left, even though the sky was
most beautiful to the left. I got to see her laugh, something i don't
see that often. We just talked like friends talk. Ya know, as much as i
can blabber on and on and on, i really love to listen more than i like
to talk. Just get a chance to sit back and take it all in. Now before i
get too mushy, let me tell you about a guy named Adam. Adam is a great
guy. And he was hilarious last night, as always. From family guy to
putting his hands in places he shoudln't, Adam made me laugh more than
anybody last night. I don't mean to exclude anybody by only mentioning
Adam, in fact maybe i'll mention one important person per post. That'll
give me at least one thing to write about when i add something to
this....thing.....this xanga deal.
Does anybody out there watch Ed on TBS? It would be nice to talk to
some other fans who like Ed. It's such a great show. The characters are
so honest, so open with eachother. I wish i could do that. And of
course it's funny. I don't watch not-funny tv. The ten dollar bets are
awesome fun, in fact i've been asked to do some ten dollar bets, but
alas, i declined in shame. I wear a dunce cap atop my skull which sits
on no spine....Yes, right now i need to get my spine back.
Anyone who reads this, please give sympathy to my dear friend Krystyna.
Her dog is not in the best of health if you know what i mean, and it's
been tough for her. Give her a prayer, or if you don't pray, some
sympathy or reassurance will do. It's hard to lose a pet no matter what
anybody says, so leave a comment with dryice1001!
I think i'm done.
Ryan
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| So it's Thursday....yup...Thursday....good day it is. I feel a lot
better today than i have this week, probably because i had a good talk
with my therapist/psychologist, whatever you wish to call him. BTW
everyone could use a little therapy i don't care who you are, it's
amazing. It gets stuff out of my system that i probably wouldn't talk
to anyone else about (yet) and i just feel damn good after every
session, and that has been true every week, which is huge for me.
Yesterday i went to see MadagASScar with Christine and Ronnie. Fun
times, and those two are the most dirty-minded people i've ever met.
Their minds are further down in the gutter than mine, which is
impressive, not to mention they're girls. Again, fun times. I did want
to talk to Christine for a little while even though i didn't get the
chance, ya know, just to iron things out, put the past in the past for
sure. Anyway the movie was pretty good, it had it's moments. But i saw
kicking and screaming the night before with Richie which was just
amazingly hilarious, but only if you like Will Ferrell, which i do very
much.
YES, I'm fixing this stupid virus-laden, spyware-filled computer and i
don't have to reformat, which would take two hours! Thank you virus
scan. In all of my spyware hunting i have indeed forgotten that viruses
exist and are quite prevalent these days, especially to the
unprotected. But not to worry, i have found a great anti-virus app,
AVG. My computer is now bulletproof with software firewall, anti-virus,
and two anti-spyware, not to mention a dedicated kick-ass smoothwall
firewall.
Anyway, i just thought i'd mention the totally sweet time i spent with
richie after we saw kicking and screaming. We both drive nice cars
(mine's faster!!) and we were racing up and down the eden's, because
there are never any cops on it. I taught Richie how to downshift and
get killer pickup to pass people, which we then did to eachother over
and over and over. This is not the kind of driving my girlfriend would
approve of, but don't worry baby, i was totally safe the whole time.
It's like i told you, i drive fast, but i'm not an idiot (when i'm
driving!). I think i broke my speed record, going 120 at my fastest,
which is just plain freaky deaky scary, but in a good way. Good times.
****If anybody ever needs computer advice, help, troubleshooting,
fixing, repairing or shopping for hardware or software, please leave me
a comment with your email address and i would be more than happy to
help you, in most cases for free .****
Ryan in. Seacrest out.
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| Being late. Nobody likes doing it, ESPECIALLY me, but it happens. I
wish that being late wasn't such a terrible thing but it is. There are
no excuses, no apologies: nothing can save a late person from being
late. But I hate it. I can't stand it. There is very little in this
world that makes me feel worse than being late. My being late will hurt
me more than it will ever hurt the people who depended on me in the
first place.
But i wanted to be there so badly, i didn't want to be late, and doesn't that count for something? anything?
Anyway...it's a beautiful night out and i think this is why i got a
laptop...to go outside with it. Yesterday i played ultimate frisbee for
the first time and it was awesome. Yesterday was awesome in general and
i hope that the summer is full of more days like it. Like i said to
someone yesterday, the summer is looking up. Soon i'll have a pool and
hopefully have a pool party, because that's what you do with a pool. On
a complete tangent, how has it been that i have posted exactly once
every other day? i never planned on doing things like that, it just
kinda worked out. Strange huh?
I keep having self-revelations lately. I or someone else will say
something that, on the surface sounds completely normal, but for some
reason that normal something shakes my world or makes me realize
something about myself that i couldn't explain. Very rewarding
experiences, these are. It's quite amazing how i dont know
myself. Even more amazing to learn something new. A lot of my own
revelations come from a painful experience. At least, the best ones do.
Recently i learned how i can be manipulating even when i think i'm
not.......to anyone i've ever controlled or manipulated, you have my
deepest apologies. Nothing is worse than not being yourself, and i
don't want anyone to try to be something they're not because of me. And
on a completely different note, Na, seeing as we've never had sex or
done anything stupid like that, we are by no stretch of the imagination
fuck buddies. In my mind there are two kinds of fuck buddies, the ones
who meet each other agreeing to it, like on a dating site or something,
or when two people are in a relationship that maybe started out good,
but the basis for staying together is the sex. Both of which are bad
times.
Know what else is wierd? Each successive entry is longer than the last,
and i think this one will follow suit, even though i can't see it right
now on my page. MAN what a beautiful night! I think i'm just gonna sit
here and ponder myself, the world, people, and the sky. And no, i'm not
high. Not right now i'm not.
Ryan in, seacrest out
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| SO here i am at Richie's...all by myself fixing his computer. Reminds
me of the Green Day song, a funny little tune on the dookie album
that's just quirky. Right now the computer is downloading all the
security hole patches from windows and it's taking for god damn ever
because windows has more holes than swiss cheese. And here i am left
with nothing to do but get paid to do nothing.
Last night i fought with Na. As i think about why we were fighting it
sounds more silly to me. Long story short just call me an insecure
little bioch, but with valid concerns. But i still like her and she
still likes me and maybe we'll get through this stupid mess. I still
have a lot to learn about dating, and i think it's mostly the
friendship part of dating that sometimes i miss entirely. This is just
my personal view, but i'm beginning to think more and more that a
girlfriend (or boyfriend for you chicks out there) shouldn't just be a
romantic interest. I've been there and it just gets boring and after a
while when i step back from the fireworks i think "what the hell was i
doing??" You can't discount the "friend" part of girlfriend. I used to
think that when i met someone, if i wanted to ask them out that was the
goal, not to become friends, because friends don't go out--they're
friends, remember? But more now i see that being a good friend and
having a good friend in a partner is really a huuuuge bonus. Anyone can
be your fuck-buddy, but not everyone can be just a regular buddy. In
that respect it's hard for me to be friends with someone i'm attracted
to, because my mind is trapped in....well other places. That's the
challenge for me, is to be friends.
My new job is semi wonderful. I say semi because my boss touched my
computer screen and his list of email contacts fucked with my email
prog. Those are two things i cannot stand. Otherwise it's great! I get
creative input, experience in beginning to market stuff, call people on
business, i'm really part of this business. It's a mortgage business by
the way. I know i know, not the most exciting subject in the world, but
it's not dreadfully boring like one might think. And plus, i did some
multiplication and figure that i make somewhere around $30k/year with
my current hours and salary. That's pretty bitchin for my second job.
Which i work at home. On my own hours. At my own computer. That should
pay for college almost entirely.
Ah, i hope there's an episode of ed waiting for me at home. I need
something to do, I've been working on computers all day and i need ed.
And na said she'd call me, which is good, and she can tell me all about
having dinner with the cardinal and playing violin for the hors
d'oeuvres (not that the little morsels of food were listening anyway!)
Freycrest out <-----------------that's pretty corny right?
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